Dorothy Mantooth is a Saint

Sports, pop culture, and politics, Pittsburgh-style, with french fries on top.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Butt Seriously

When you head to the ballpark this summer, leave your smokes at home:

"The only smoking this year inside PNC Park will come via fastballs and hot bats. Beginning Opening Day, smoking will be prohibited anywhere in the ballpark."

Other bad things that have yet to be banned at PNC Park include:

  • The Pirates' 783-996 record since 1996

  • Jose Castillo's work ethic

  • Flying weiners (from the Pirate Parrot's hot dog bazooka)

  • Overall sense of malaise after Pirates are eliminated from playoffs by May

  • Fire hazard caused by Nuttings belly-laughing while lighting cigars with flaming $100 bills

  • Not tipping Derek Bell when he plays your request on the trumpet as you cross the Clemente Bridge

  • Flying weiners (when Anna Benson returns to town)



Anonymous Woy said...

You forgot to mention girls on Ladies Night who are wearing outfits that are so ill-fittingly tight that it makes Babe Ruth look svelte.

9:05 PM  

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