Bill Cowher Drives Like A Retiree

It's been at least several days since the local news outlets have given us a "where is he now" update on Bill Cowher, so it was good to see him take to a stock car and compete in the Fast Cars and Superstars celebrity race on ABC last night. How did he do?

"Things didn't go well for the former coach, who ended up finishing last after stalling his car leaving the pit stop and turned in a fastest average lap of 139 mph, slowest of all the competitors."
-Rocky Mountain News

139 mph? Most days, people go faster than that on the Parkway East (when there's no construction). We're not trying to say that Bill Cowher has lost his competitive edge, but when Jewel beats you in a NASCAR race, um, yeah maybe retirement was the right idea.

If you're bored, you can watch the show here. But we suggest you go outside and get some fresh air or something.