Monday Morning Musings

First order of business: Other than Willie Parker, the offensive line, the defense and the fact that almost every stat ended in the Steelers’ favor, yesterday’s game sucked. Entertainment-wise, it was better than the creeping death that was the Monday night Jacksonville game… but outcome wise, worse.

As a side note, after interacting with some Bengals fans at Heinz Field before the game, it struck me that they’re pretty cocky for a group of people who just got up the stones to wear their jerseys in public about a year ago.

Moving on…

Because, as Americans, we love lists and useless surveys, Biz Journals has conducted a study to find out which NFL team has the most loyal fans. Their conclusion is that the most die-hard football fanatics are… Cleveland Browns fans. (Steeler fans came in at # 21 on their list.)

At first, I was surprised, but after thinking about it, maybe we do have to give it up to the Browns fans. They’ve been through a lot. John Elway putting the nuts to them year after year. Art Modell ripping their team out of the city. Just the colors of the uniforms (who decided that poop brown and traffic cone orange was the way to go?) And through it all, Cleveland Browns fans are loyal enough to keep showing up. Sort of like a dog that runs to its’ owner when called… and then gets kicked in the slats when it gets there. The dog runs away, but when the owner calls again… it comes right back. And gets kicked again. Lather, rinse, repeat.

So, congrats, Browns fans.

And we can relate. The Pirates do it to us every year here in Pittsburgh.

Other noteworthy NFL Fans:

Oakland Raiders fans
Raiders fans are interesting because they’re not afraid to combine their love of Satan with their love of football. I went to a Raiders-Rams game in Anaheim in the mid-90s and lost count of how many fights there were in the stands. Pagan rituals and sacrifices are considered lighthearted fun at a Raiders game.

Seattle Seahawks fans
Easily the most colicky fans in the National Football League, Seahawks supporters will go out of their way to tell you how Super Bowl XL was stolen from them. The reality of it is that it was a crappy game and the Steelers sucked just slightly less than the Seahawks did that day. If confronted by Seahawks fans, swaddle them in a blanket and gently rock until they fall asleep.

Philadelphia Eagles fans
Passionate is one way to describe Eagles fans. Intensely angry and violent is another, more accurate way. These are the fans who booed Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and cheered as Michael Irvin lay motionless after a neck-breaking, career-ending injury on the Eagles’ thinly covered cement field. Ok, on second thought, the Irvin thing is kind of understandable, but still: Santa and the Easter Bunny? That’s just wrong.